The test of Love

I feel like I am in battle.
All I want is peace.
I am tired of the anger I feel.
I know it takes two to break apart the love,
so your not all to blame.
Maybe if I let you be right
and let go of my anger and shame,
than we can blow out the flame.
Than maybe you will let me be.
I know that the freedom I seek will
really equal me missing you.

I just do not want to fight,
it is too hard.
I am not ready yet to let go
of my love..but you
have moved forward and I need
chance to do that to.

You have love for me, and are
scared to lose me completely.
Sometimes you have to let go
of love, set someone free, and
they may find their way back.
You have to have the trust, they will
come back to you.
Different and stronger.
You have a fear of losing me,
but right now their is nothing
left of me.
Our love has shifted, with fear and distrust.
Our love collided but it has become misguided.
I will always love you,but I can live with love
and not trust you.
I can not live joyfully when you do not trust me
enough to share with me.
Are wanting and desire is not strong enough
anymore to accept what we lack.

I am spent, not strong, not resilient
and lost.
I can not live wondering and not trusting
you.
I wanted to feel safe and be invited into your
life.
You are scared to be trapped but I would never
have path to find you.

I do not at this point know where to go.
I do not have desire to control you.
I have no energy to go looking for you.
If you wanted me to, I would however find you.
No more of energy will be spent fighting you,
blaming you, or escaping you.
Let's just find some peace.
karmasage

Fears that come undone

I did not think I would find my heart here again;
open, natural,and untamed.
I thought a broken heart could not mend.
I thought the sadness would encompass me
I thought my fear would rule me!

To my surprise I let my fear dissipate...slow but sure.
I let someone look inside and pull at my heart strings.
I let them embrace my soul...for moment!
And to my dismay,
I let out the passion... from inside!

He challenged me.
He tested me.
He swayed me.
He eluded me.
He stripped away parts of me.

Like sculptured clay his fears
began to fall away...each time I pulled away.
As I tried to run he would speed ahead.
When I wanted to let go he held on.

He was holding on to his own set of fears.
His own packages of distrust.
He held that love could not come from one.
Never really getting close ... only ..almost!

Like living mirrors,
reflections of each others fears,
a love transpired... with it
came a deep desire!

Stripped naked and exposed
a familiar trust arose.
A karmic click!
A dual surrender...of untamed
hearts, that will not come apart.
This is what happens when fears,
finally come undone.

karma sage